At the start of the year, I dreamed about cycling with my daughter to her nursery.

In my head, it was such a lovely picture. Me cycling along with my daughter on the back of my bicycle, both of us enjoying the fresh air, getting some exercise and starting our mornings outdoors.

There was just one tiny problem.

SEVEN HILLS.

There are seven steep hills between our house and her nursery, and I was absolutely terrified of cycling up them with her.

I was worried about the traffic, whether I was fit enough to get up those hills, and the thought of losing my balance and falling over with my daughter on the back.

So instead of actually getting on my bicycle, I did what I tend to do when I'm scared of something.

I thought about it. I talked about it. I fantasised about it. I imagined how lovely it would be.

And then I thought about it some more. 😂

Basically, I did everything EXCEPT get on the bicycle.

Until one day, I thought, why am I making such a big deal out of this? Why don't I just start by cycling up and down the flat road outside my house?

No hills, no traffic to worry about, no pressure to get anywhere. Just me, my daughter and our little road.

So that's what I did.

For a whole week, I cycled up and down the road outside my house with her every day.

And you know what? It actually worked.

I started feeling more confident. I got used to having her on the back of the bicycle, I got more comfortable balancing with the extra weight, and the whole thing started feeling less scary.

After a week, I felt brave enough to start cycling further.

It made me realise something about self-confidence that I think applies to so many areas of our lives.

Sometimes we spend so much time waiting to feel confident enough to do something, when actually, the confidence comes from DOING the thing.

And it got me thinking about how much a lack of self-confidence can hold us back.

How often do we second-guess ourselves or stay in situations that we know aren't right for us because we don't believe we can change them?

How many things have we wanted to do but talked ourselves out of because we didn't think we were clever enough, attractive enough, experienced enough or capable enough?

I think having confidence in yourself, your skills and your body is such an important part of creating a life that actually makes you happy.

And one thing that's really helped me over the years is learning to take small actions towards the things I want, even when I'm scared.

For example, if you've always dreamed of running a marathon but haven't run in years, you don't need to start by running 10 km. Start by walking half a kilometre every day. (this is how I convinced 10 ladies to go from 0km to 7km, 10km and now soon 21km at the end of this month in my Running Queens group)

If you want to improve your health, you don't need to overhaul your entire diet or buy a cupboard full of supplements. Maybe you start by eating more vegetables or making sure you're drinking enough water.

If you've been dreaming about starting a business, maybe your first step is simply spending 15 minutes researching how to get started.

The point is to make it so manageable that you actually DO it.

And then do it again.

And again.

Because something interesting happens when you consistently follow through on the things you tell yourself you're going to do.

You start trusting yourself more.

You start thinking, "Actually, I CAN do this."

And that little bit of confidence gives you the courage to try something slightly bigger.

This is something that's helped me enormously in my own life, especially when I decided to pursue an unconventional career path.

There was a time when the thought of not having a traditional job, a regular salary or someone telling me when and how to work felt terrifying.

But I started taking small steps towards the kind of life I wanted, and over time, those little steps gave me the confidence to make bigger decisions.

I certainly didn't wake up one morning feeling brave enough to change my entire life!

It happened gradually.

Another area where I've had to rebuild my confidence is my body.

After I had my daughter, I gained over 20 kg, and honestly, my body confidence took a massive hit.

My old clothes didn't fit, I didn't feel like myself, and getting dressed became a frustrating experience.

I kept looking at my wardrobe and thinking I had nothing to wear, even though it was full of clothes!

And for a while, I had this idea in my head that once I lost the weight, I'd start dressing nicely again.

But then I thought, hang on a minute. Why am I waiting until I lose weight to feel good about myself?

Why can't I look nice NOW?

So I started building myself a capsule wardrobe.

If you haven't heard of a capsule wardrobe before, it's basically a small collection of clothes that you can mix and match to create lots of different outfits.

And honestly, I wish I'd done it sooner.

Instead of buying random clothes that looked nice in the shop but didn't go with anything I owned, I started buying pieces that actually suited my body and worked together.

It saved me money, made getting dressed so much easier and meant I wasn't constantly standing in front of my wardrobe wondering what on earth to wear.

But the biggest benefit was that I started feeling good in my clothes again.

And I think that's something we sometimes forget when we're trying to improve ourselves.

You can work towards becoming a better version of yourself while still appreciating the person you are today.

You don't need to wait until you've lost weight, earned more money, changed careers or achieved some big goal before allowing yourself to feel good about who you are.

Anyway, all of this has been on my mind recently because I've been putting together November's Sparkles of Joy snail mail envelope, and this month's theme is all about building self-confidence and learning to love your body and mind.

I've been thinking about the things that have genuinely helped me feel more confident over the years, and I wanted to share some of them with you.

Here's what I'm including in November's envelope:

💗 A personal letter on building self-confidence

I'm going into more detail about the things that have helped me build confidence in myself, stop second-guessing my decisions and find the courage to go after the things I want in life.

👗 A practical guide to building a capsule wardrobe on a budget

I'm sharing how to create a simple wardrobe that suits your body, without spending a fortune or buying loads of new clothes. This is something that really helped me feel better about my body after having my daughter.

🥗 My 7-day meal plan and grocery list

I've also put together a full week's meal plan, including breakfast, lunch, dinner and a grocery list.

It's based on how I started eating healthier, adding more vegetables to my meals and being more intentional about what I ate.

I actually lost around 4.35 kg in 3 weeks, following this approach without doing a huge amount of exercise, but what I liked most was that I was eating better and feeling stronger.

Of course, everyone's body is different, and weight loss isn't the goal for everyone. I just wanted to share something practical that worked for me.

✨ Some cute affirmation stickers

Because who doesn't love a little reminder that they're doing better than they think?

📚 A book discussion

I've chosen a book that really made me think differently about confidence and self-belief, and I'll be sharing the lessons I took away from it.

🎧 A podcast recommendation

I'm also including a podcast that I listen to whenever I'm having one of those days where I'm doubting myself and need a bit of encouragement.

I've really enjoyed putting this envelope together because confidence is something I've struggled with at different stages of my life, and I know I'm not alone in that.

I hope that some of the things I'm sharing will help you too.

If you'd like to receive November's envelope, you can join the Sparkles of Joy Mail Club here:

​JOIN THE SPARKLES OF JOY MAIL CLUB​

And before I go, I wanted to ask you something.

Is there something you've been wanting to do for ages but keep putting off because you don't feel confident enough?

Maybe it's applying for a new job, starting a business, joining a gym or even something as simple as cycling up seven hills with your toddler on the back. 😂

Whatever it is, I wonder if there's a smaller version of it that you could try this week.

I'd love to hear what it is. Hit reply and tell me!

Thanks for reading

Aisha Preece from Outandbeyond.com and Sparkles of Joy ​

PS: I share my bare minimum low-effort strategy to grow my businesses on my Instagram stories — if you want more behind-the-scenes like this, come hang out: @aishapreece​

Some of my slow journey of cycling where I eventually felt confident to take her up 7 hills in peak traffic!

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